Thursday, October 23, 2014

Selective Amnesia

Don't put your happiness in other people's hands.  
They'll drop it. 
They'll drop it every time. 
- C.Barzak

So apparently, the bridge is gone. I still don't know what happened. I wonder if I'll ever know. I see her but there's just nothing that connects us now. I would like to say that I burned the bridge on my side myself, that I set a flame to all of it and that I watched gleefully as it disintegrated in front of me. But who are we kidding? We all know she has severed the bonds beforehand.

A part of me wants to know what the hell happened, for her to cut me off like that, but my pride wouldn't let me be the first to talk to her. There was a slight we couldn't get over, a disregard we couldn't forgive. Not until we hear her side at least. Not until she talks to us first.

It's just sad, you know.  Because it was like the last month never happened. Suddenly, she seems to have forgotten that I even exist. And I know I shouldn't dwell on it, there are other people in the world, but I somehow just couldn't accept how easy it was for her to forget me. Were all those talks a sham for her? Because at the very least, I thought we had good conversations.

Couldn't she respect me enough to give me an explanation?

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